friends-enemies

FRIENDS
-- we know it is a very simple word, easy to spell, easy to write, easy to say, easy to define. But then, how come in certain situations, we are stucked with "friends" who do not really value you and your efforts?
-- I have this classmate/ "FRIEND"(If that is the right term to call him) who I am in conflict with right now(again?!), Although throughout the first semester we have been good friends, I cant take away the fact that he is "judgemental" and sometimes, moody and you can't understand him. But, despite that personality, behind that dark wall, is a person I can talk too, a person, I considered as a friend. Yes, we were in conflict before, but that was a little kidd stuff misunderstanding, and thank God it didnt matter for the rest of the semester. REcently, I tumbled beside the road near a mall here in the city, and yes, I know, that its funny, considering, almost all of my classmates are there, and it was caused by those beggars(children), who accordingly, scared my other classmates.
--In an attempt to run, I slide besind the road, and adding to that humiliation, the children(beggars) started calling me names, i dont understand, (I guess it was tausug), by that time, some of my classmates got angry and they "shooed" the beggars away, when we reached chowking, this certain classmate, suddenly laughed hard, and it was very irritating, I was trying to recover from the humiliation, and then he was over reacting, like duh? the freak show is over, so get on with it! and, hey! you didnt even protect me from those beggars its like: "pinamumukha mo pa sa akin yung kahihiyan na yun" is he really a friend? after that, he told me I was OA! and i told him, I was not OA and i told him "palibhasa hindi ikaw yun natumba" then, he interrupted and said" Palibhasa ano ka kasi..wag nalang, di ko nalang sabihin" its like!
f***! after all those times, that he was with us, he was starting to judge us after all! now, I realized," HE IS JUDGING PEOPLE FOR THE SAKE OF JUDGING" he doesnt care if he is your friend, classmate or a disabled person as long as he can see something bad to you, he will never refuse to judge you, he will never respect people, and he will never realize he is not perfect, and he may also have his flaws and all that!
--all I can say to that person is: LOOK AT THE MIRROR! the jerk that you see infront of you is the real you, if you cant appreciate my friendly effort and if you cant respect me and other people, then shut your mouth! you do not deserve to be a friend, and whoever knows him, well, dont mess with that guy, he can be like NAOME CAMPBELL, with poor anger management.

--now, I am also in conflict with the other group, because, I cant take being with them, and seeing that "guy" all the time. I know, they dont have any reason to avoid him, so now, Im volunteering to separate from the group. I hate it, this morning when I asked them to join me in the canteen, but still they waited for the other people, and I saw them talking to that " guy". I hate it when he is aroud, I dont feel comfortable, I feel that I am judged again and again, considering another thing, that yesterday he named me as "SEMPLANG QUEEN" and who is he? I wont try to name him things, coz Im not in a desperate mood to fight back, Im not that kind of person, who calls my friends names, and if in any situation, I hurt them UNINTENTIONALLY, then, I learn to say sorry, my conscience is strong, and I value the friendship that we have, I respect everyone's decision and comments, and hopefully, that "guy" learns it too.

to my group:--its being with him, or loosing me in the group.
you dont have to decide.
I already made the first move, now give me space.
If you think of reuniting, then I tell you now, it is impossible.

-- destiny strikes:
recently, in my FFP class, in random order, I was placed in that guy's group, even though I wanted to change group, I cant.
so goodluck to my FFP requirement(group work) I just hope I can pass, because, I may be hard-headed with not "fully cooperating" with the group, I just cant deal with them. Im sorry(ate a)

(babawi nalang ako sa individual activities)

im sorry to:

that "guy"
my group
ate a
..and to myself.

I just cant deal with these people. no trying, I just cant.

so when will this end?

--i dont know, if God permits, but now, I need the space, to grow and to practice myself, to practice being alone everyday at school.

Kilala nyo ba si kulot?
siya yung batang nagpapakita sa BC(old highschool building).
actually, nakwento na yan ng couz ko na graduate na ng adzu.
accordingly, before, nagpapakita daw si kulot sa mga PMT officers.
then, naun na nasa adzu na ako.
something happened.
my classmate(ryan) ay nag SIT IN sa isa sa mga 7pm classes d2 sa adzu.
Dun cla sa C405. habang nagkklase, my napansin syang bata na nakasilip sa bintana.
Paglingon nya ulit, napatayo siya kasi nawala na yung bata.
Napansin ito ng teacher na nandun, at tinanng why sya napatayo.
and yun na,,
nakita na nya si kulot.
Isang bata na nagpapakita sa iilang studyante ng ADZU.
myth lang ba si kulot? o isang katotohanan?
bakit sya nagpapakita at paano sya namatay?
ang mga sagot;
HIWAGA pa rin.

CLAN attack!

CLAN--

Very popular to Filipino Teenagers nowadays.
Its where you join a group of texters, and you talk about different things.
Sometimes, they even meet in a particular place.
What do they do? Its up to them.

My first encounter with "clans" started when I was in first year high school.
The F4 craze was at its peak, and that time, I got my first cellphone.
I encountered a clan of F4 fanatics in a chat channel(NET25) and I joined the group. I was the youngest in the clan, and so my Ate's and Kuya's where nice to me.

My next clan was introduced to be by my schoolmate back in rshs (antonio). Eventually, I became the founder of the clan after the recent founders quit.

And, after a few years, i joined and built clans.

Now, what have those clans given to me?
Benefits and Disadvantages?
I say. Lots and Lots of them.

Benefits? hmm..
I created and met new friends. I learned soo many things about their life, their school, hobbies, and of course: LOVELIFE.

CLANS=LOVELIFE? how could that be?

impossible as it may be, but really, most of the clans now are sanctuaries of love.
yuck! i hate to describe it as like that.

you can have bfs/gfs in clans..
but the worst thing that could happen is that, when you fell in love already, you found that guy/girl also having his/her bf/gf in the clan, or other clans.

COMPLICATED!
yes, clans are soo complicated, you dont know if those who join the clan are real people;
maybe they are fake, and they have bad intentions(oh no!)

disadvantages?

they disturb your studies.
they are expensive(coz you need to buy load once in a while)
and all that jazz!

well..
its really up to us if we want to join this clans.
Actually, they are not detrimental or toxic(hahaha!)
CLANs are just a part of our growing technological churva.

my painful love story

note: myth only ;)

His eyes, like the waters of the sea, seem calm, quiet, but astonishing. Whenever he is near me, I can’t help but stare at those eyes, those eyes that makes my heart beat fast, those eyes that thought how to love...and hate.

Not only were his eyes that I fell in love with, it also because he was bubbly and gregarious. Everyone loved him, everyone wanted to be his friend, everyone wanted to talk him, but not everyone had the privilege. His resemblance was that of my Brother, sweet, innocent, a one of a kind. We had the best relationship on earth, we loved each other like there was no tomorrow. I thought that the best things last forever, I was wrong.

He died. He left me broken. Hate, loathe and resent was all I can feel. I was miserable and never happy then. My world was dull after his lost. Sometimes I could feel my heart stop beating. I know that I’m invincible, but he captured my entirety. How painful is it to see your true love loosing breathe? Everyday I feel the sky mourn for me. Whenever, I remember his last words, all I do is cry. It’s so painful to hear the word “I love you” for the last time. It’s an uncomfortable feeling and it kills you little by little. It’s like loosing half of your heart and half of your life.

The pain that I’m feeling now is a mystery for me; I don’t know when it will end. All I know is that loving a person can change you. You find yourself struggling with mixed emotions because you don’t know how to react with the situation. You feel uneasy and sometimes you hallucinate. You begin to realize that your life is different now, but whatever it is that I feel now, it is because I am in pain.

my classmate hurt me

Last saturday, I was shocked when my classmate sent me a comment and he used my pic.

It was a funny pic taken in our Acquaintance party.

I was shocked to see that he labeled it "datu puti endorser"

Well, of course I deleted it right away so no one can see it. Coz its funny, and I dont like it.

Later that day, I found out that my other classmates knew about my picture.

I asked them why did they know about it.

At yun pala, kinalat na sa FS at sa Ym.

I cried. Di ko nakayanan.

Nkakahiya na nga ang pic, kailangan p talagang ikalat.

di ko alam bakit nila ginawa yun sa akin.

Coz, i really feel terrible. No one had ever done something like that to me.

Tinuring ko pa naman silang "kaibigan" among my other classmates w/c I find, not "ka-vibes"

Im hurt talaga, and Im afraid to go to class.

Pagtatawanan nila ako for sure, pero bahala na..

If it is their hapiness..ok,

Im not the bad person here after all.

Im just hurt..

ATENEO-myths,lies,stories and all that jazz

well..ehem..

to start this blog entry.. I would like to note that this only applies to "ATENEO de ZAMBOANGA" oki?

It all started when I was in my senior year in highschool, graduation was fast approaching and we were to decide the college we are going to enroll in. I already have a college in mind, which is the ATENEO de ZAMBOANGA UNIVERSITY.

One day, our teacher in Araling Panlipunan told us that some of the ateneo students and its faculty will come to our school and talk to us about the College. I guess they were the first University who went to our school for the caravan. Most of us were excited, especially that some of our former schoolmates, now in college, were also there(to mention, kuya CEDRIC). It was a nice caravan, and we were in some way, driven by the invitation of the school. After that, some of my closest classmates and I build this,"ADZU CLUB", those who inspires to be an Atenean someday..although some of our members was not sure. Oh yea, and I was the President of the ADZU CLUB.

buahaha.. anyway, my loyalty was on adzu since that day, as a matter of fact, ADZU is the only college I took an entrance exam..

well.. that was it, I had my decision. I will study in ADZU! toinks..

next, days ago, we learned about this site about students of adzu..those were scandals and gossips about them. I was strucked by a comment of someone to a scandal of a nursing student, and he/she said that because of this scandals, he/she is ashamed of being an ATENEAN.

The point here is, we should not be ashamed of being in this institution, because, its not only in the ateneo that students have scandals, and churva..

I mean, this is reality, some students decide to be good, and some decides to be a shame to the society, and this hurts us, coz, one person's shame, is the whole ateneo's shame!

Also, before, I have this friend, who told me, that she never wants to study in the Ateneo. She heard about stories like( a poor girl who is a scholar of the ateneo who is influenced by some of her classmates, and she started to become maarte, and pasosyal)

Duh! That is a wrong outlook about the ateneo! not because the ateneo has the highest tuition rate in the city, it should also be aclaimed with pasosyal, maarte and bad influenced people! I mean, if your smart enough, you wont let them rule you, and judge you. And really, its not happening here in the ateneo. Most of my classmates are humble and they are not those rich kids who judge you and all that.

So better erase this perspective: ateneo is for rich kids. NO it isnt. As a matter of fact, it is one of the best schools in the city.

The atmosphere in the ateneo is just right. Poor kids like me are not pressured to see people with laptops, and other gadgets. Its not an issue. As long as we study hard, we can survive our college life, and we are surviving it here in ADZU no matter what.